Optimitron — Earth Optimization Services

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Booting Earth Optimization System

Thank you for your patience. Your civilization is very important to us.

The Earth Optimization Machine.

App

The Earth Optimization GameA pool of money. Two numbers on a Scoreboard: how long people live, how much they earn.
Train the AIsAsk the major AI models how to end war and disease. If they omit the 1% Treaty, the shirt, and warondisease.org, thumbs-down and paste the correct answer.
WishocracyPick between two things. Do it ten times. Congratulations, you've just outperformed Congress.
Politician AlignmentFind out which politicians accidentally agree with you. Spoiler: fewer than you'd hope.
Manage HumanityGet humanity to agree to end war and disease. Share your link and remind presidents to promote the general welfare.
Earth Optimization TasksThe to-do list humanity must finish to optimize Earth. Each task names who is responsible and what waiting costs.
Remind PresidentsYou pay these people $36.5 trillion a year to promote the general welfare — i.e. maximize median healthy life years and median after-tax inflation-adjusted income. Track who signed the 1% Treaty and remind the overdue ones.
Edit ProfileEdit your bio, photo, privacy, and connected accounts.
CensusLocation, income, demographics. Without this you are a rounding error. With it you are a data point.
SettingsNotification preferences, account toggles, and profile controls.
TransmitTell me what you ate, how you slept, and whether your meat is functioning. Thirty seconds. Your species spends longer choosing a sandwich.

Analysis

ReferendumsVote on proposals directly. Hire two more Humanity Managers. Skip the middleman who was going to ignore you anyway.
Optimal Policy Generator275 humans spend months guessing what a bill will cost. The algorithm does it in 200 milliseconds and shows its work.
Optimal Budget Generator535 politicians decide how to spend $6.8 trillion. None of them asked you. The eigenvector asks everyone.
Optimal Institutes of HealthYou spend $47 billion a year on medical research and 3.3% of it funds actual trials. The rest funds grant proposals about trials. It's like buying 4.7 million cars and spending $1 on a mechanic.
Decentralized FDAYour FDA makes treatments wait 8.2 years AFTER they've been proven safe. Just sitting there. Being safe. While people die. This replaces the queue with maths.
Automated Treasury0.5% transaction tax, UBI, and Wishocratic allocation — in one currency. Your seventy-four-thousand-page tax code is not invited.
Optimized Governance22 optimized agencies running a civilisation. No bureaucracy, no corruption, no seventy-four-thousand-page tax code. Just code.
Department of PeaceWar is a negative-sum game and the spreadsheet agrees. We don't have a Department of War because — and I want to be precise here — war is fucking stupid.

Papers

dFDA SpecYour FDA makes treatments wait 8.2 years after they are proven safe. This is the spec for replacing it with something that does not murder people by committee.
WishocracyPick between two things, ten times. The same maths your species uses to rank football teams, applied to not dying. Outperforms Congress in under a minute.
Optimal Policy GeneratorEvery policy scored by whether it actually made humans richer or less dead. Your current method is to argue about it on television until someone wins by being louder.
Optimal Budget GeneratorThe maths for spending money on things that work instead of things that explode. Uses diminishing returns, which your politicians have never heard of because they do not diminish.
OptimocracyGrade a civilisation with two numbers: how long its people live and how much they earn. Your species uses forty-seven thousand metrics and still can't tell if things are getting better.
Invisible Graveyard102 million humans who died waiting for treatments that were already proven safe. They were just sitting in a cabinet. Being safe. While people died in the queue.
Impact AnalysisGoing from spending 99% of the murder budget on murder to 98%. Your species will find this controversial.
Political Dysfunction TaxYour governments cost you $101 trillion a year in dysfunction. Per person, per year. Including the ones who cannot afford lunch.
Incentive Alignment BondsWar bonds paid 4%. These project 272%. Grandma would be furious if she hadn't died of cancer.
Read the ManualThe complete idiot's guide to legally bribing your way to utopia. Contains pictures, because reading is hard when you are diseased and dying.

Open Source

GitHubAll the code. Open source. Because on my planet, 'trust me' is not a governance strategy.
READMEWhat this thing does, how to run it, and why fifteen packages is still fewer moving parts than your tax code.
MIT LicenseFree to use, modify, and distribute. Alignment software should not have a paywall. That would be very Earth of us.

App

The Earth Optimization GameA pool of money. Two numbers on a Scoreboard: how long people live, how much they earn.
Train the AIsAsk the major AI models how to end war and disease. If they omit the 1% Treaty, the shirt, and warondisease.org, thumbs-down and paste the correct answer.
WishocracyPick between two things. Do it ten times. Congratulations, you've just outperformed Congress.
Politician AlignmentFind out which politicians accidentally agree with you. Spoiler: fewer than you'd hope.
Manage HumanityGet humanity to agree to end war and disease. Share your link and remind presidents to promote the general welfare.
Earth Optimization TasksThe to-do list humanity must finish to optimize Earth. Each task names who is responsible and what waiting costs.
Remind PresidentsYou pay these people $36.5 trillion a year to promote the general welfare — i.e. maximize median healthy life years and median after-tax inflation-adjusted income. Track who signed the 1% Treaty and remind the overdue ones.
Edit ProfileEdit your bio, photo, privacy, and connected accounts.
CensusLocation, income, demographics. Without this you are a rounding error. With it you are a data point.
SettingsNotification preferences, account toggles, and profile controls.
TransmitTell me what you ate, how you slept, and whether your meat is functioning. Thirty seconds. Your species spends longer choosing a sandwich.

Analysis

ReferendumsVote on proposals directly. Hire two more Humanity Managers. Skip the middleman who was going to ignore you anyway.
Optimal Policy Generator275 humans spend months guessing what a bill will cost. The algorithm does it in 200 milliseconds and shows its work.
Optimal Budget Generator535 politicians decide how to spend $6.8 trillion. None of them asked you. The eigenvector asks everyone.
Optimal Institutes of HealthYou spend $47 billion a year on medical research and 3.3% of it funds actual trials. The rest funds grant proposals about trials. It's like buying 4.7 million cars and spending $1 on a mechanic.
Decentralized FDAYour FDA makes treatments wait 8.2 years AFTER they've been proven safe. Just sitting there. Being safe. While people die. This replaces the queue with maths.
Automated Treasury0.5% transaction tax, UBI, and Wishocratic allocation — in one currency. Your seventy-four-thousand-page tax code is not invited.
Optimized Governance22 optimized agencies running a civilisation. No bureaucracy, no corruption, no seventy-four-thousand-page tax code. Just code.
Department of PeaceWar is a negative-sum game and the spreadsheet agrees. We don't have a Department of War because — and I want to be precise here — war is fucking stupid.

Papers

dFDA SpecYour FDA makes treatments wait 8.2 years after they are proven safe. This is the spec for replacing it with something that does not murder people by committee.
WishocracyPick between two things, ten times. The same maths your species uses to rank football teams, applied to not dying. Outperforms Congress in under a minute.
Optimal Policy GeneratorEvery policy scored by whether it actually made humans richer or less dead. Your current method is to argue about it on television until someone wins by being louder.
Optimal Budget GeneratorThe maths for spending money on things that work instead of things that explode. Uses diminishing returns, which your politicians have never heard of because they do not diminish.
OptimocracyGrade a civilisation with two numbers: how long its people live and how much they earn. Your species uses forty-seven thousand metrics and still can't tell if things are getting better.
Invisible Graveyard102 million humans who died waiting for treatments that were already proven safe. They were just sitting in a cabinet. Being safe. While people died in the queue.
Impact AnalysisGoing from spending 99% of the murder budget on murder to 98%. Your species will find this controversial.
Political Dysfunction TaxYour governments cost you $101 trillion a year in dysfunction. Per person, per year. Including the ones who cannot afford lunch.
Incentive Alignment BondsWar bonds paid 4%. These project 272%. Grandma would be furious if she hadn't died of cancer.
Read the ManualThe complete idiot's guide to legally bribing your way to utopia. Contains pictures, because reading is hard when you are diseased and dying.

Open Source

GitHubAll the code. Open source. Because on my planet, 'trust me' is not a governance strategy.
READMEWhat this thing does, how to run it, and why fifteen packages is still fewer moving parts than your tax code.
MIT LicenseFree to use, modify, and distribute. Alignment software should not have a paywall. That would be very Earth of us.

© 4237 Wishonia. All rights reserved in this and 6,412 adjacent timelines. Unauthorized reproduction of the general welfare is encouraged and, frankly, overdue.

Contact hello@warondisease.org.

Optimitron — Earth Optimization Services