Optimitron — The Evidence-Based Earth Optimization Game

Optimitron⚡ Optimitron

The Earth Optimization Machine.

App

🗳️WishocracyPick between two things. Do it ten times. Congratulations, you've just outperformed Congress.
🏛️AlignmentFind out which politicians accidentally agree with you. Spoiler: fewer than you'd hope.
📊DashboardYour referral link, your rank, and proof you did something other than argue about it on the internet. The rare human achievement of clicking a button.
🎯TasksConcrete tasks for actual humans, including the ones who run states and still need reminding. Claim what you can do. Track what others are supposed to do.
🧭ProfileYour name, your face, your connected accounts. On my planet this takes four seconds. Your species will somehow need twenty minutes and a password reset.
📋CensusLocation, income, demographics. Without this you are a rounding error. With it you are a data point. On your planet this counts as a promotion.
⚙️SettingsNotification preferences, account toggles, and other knobs your species inexplicably needs labelled.
📡TransmitTell me what you ate, how you slept, and whether your meat is functioning. Thirty seconds. Your species spends longer choosing a sandwich.
ℹ️AboutWhat this is, why it exists, and why an alien had to build it because your species wouldn't.

Analysis

🗳️ReferendumsVote on things that matter. Prove you're human. Skip the middleman who was going to ignore you anyway.
📋Optimal Policy Generator275 humans spend months guessing what a bill will cost. The algorithm does it in 200 milliseconds and shows its work.
💰Optimal Budget Generator535 politicians decide how to spend $6.8 trillion. None of them asked you. The eigenvector asks everyone.
🧬Optimal Institutes of Health ↗You spend $47 billion a year on medical research and 3.3% of it funds actual trials. The rest funds grant proposals about trials. It's like buying 4.7 million cars and spending $1 on a mechanic.
💊Decentralized FDA ↗Your FDA makes treatments wait 8.2 years AFTER they've been proven safe. Just sitting there. Being safe. While people die. This replaces the queue with maths.
💸Automated Treasury0.5% transaction tax, UBI, and Wishocratic allocation — in one currency. Your seventy-four-thousand-page tax code is not invited.
🏛️Optimized Governance22 optimized agencies running a civilisation. No bureaucracy, no corruption, no seventy-four-thousand-page tax code. Just code.
💀Department of PeaceWar is a negative-sum game and the spreadsheet agrees. We don't have a Department of War because — and I want to be precise here — war is fucking stupid.

Papers

🧬dFDA Spec ↗Your FDA makes treatments wait 8.2 years after they are proven safe. This is the spec for replacing it with something that does not murder people by committee.
🗳️Wishocracy ↗Pick between two things, ten times. The same maths your species uses to rank football teams, applied to not dying. Outperforms Congress in under a minute.
📋Optimal Policy Generator ↗Every policy scored by whether it actually made humans richer or less dead. Your current method is to argue about it on television until someone wins by being louder.
💰Optimal Budget Generator ↗The maths for spending money on things that work instead of things that explode. Uses diminishing returns, which your politicians have never heard of because they do not diminish.
⚖️Optimocracy ↗Grade a civilisation with two numbers: how long its people live and how much they earn. Your species uses forty-seven thousand metrics and still can't tell if things are getting better.
⚰️Invisible Graveyard ↗102 million humans who died waiting for treatments that were already proven safe. They were just sitting in a cabinet. Being safe. While people died in the queue.
🕊️The 1% Treaty ↗Going from spending 99% of the murder budget on murder to 98%. Your species will find this controversial.
🏛️Political Dysfunction Tax ↗Your governments cost you $101 trillion a year in dysfunction. Per person, per year. Including the ones who cannot afford lunch.
🤝Incentive Alignment Bonds ↗War bonds paid 4%. These project 272%. Grandma would be furious if she hadn't died of cancer.
📖Full Manual ↗The complete idiot's guide to legally bribing your way to utopia. Contains pictures, because reading is hard when you are diseased and dying.

Open Source

💻GitHub ↗All the code. Open source. Because on my planet, 'trust me' is not a governance strategy.
📝README ↗What this thing does, how to run it, and why fifteen packages is still fewer moving parts than your tax code.
📄MIT License ↗Free to use, modify, and distribute. Alignment software should not have a paywall. That would be very Earth of us.

© 4237 Wishonia. All rights reserved in this and 6,412 adjacent timelines. Unauthorized reproduction of the general welfare is encouraged and, frankly, overdue. Source code open for inspection by any sufficiently curious primate.

Published by The Earth Optimization Commission. Contact hello@warondisease.org.

Optimitron — The Evidence-Based Earth Optimization Game